Be A Doll Page 6

  “Mrs. Stein is the one in charge of Carter Manor. The Carter family hired her roughly ten years ago. I can’t stand that woman and it’s mutual.’’ I glanced at the beautiful bouquet with fresh flowers that smelled wonderful without being too overwhelming. “I guess it’s time to go through with this.’’

  “It’s going to be fine,’’ Megan said with a comforting smile as she gently patted my arm before she led the way out of the room.

  I didn’t know if it would be fine, but it didn’t really matter anyway. The wedding ceremony wasn’t the thing that had me ready to bolt, it was what would happen after.

  ***

  LILA

  Canon in D invaded my ears and my heart started hammering in my chest, the mindless beat of the rhythm of the music that was always linked to wedding ceremonies. The wedding planner, a woman who seemed way too straight laced and mean for such a job, made a wild gesture with her hand for me to walk. With a last big intake of breath, I followed her cue and took two steps to face the aisle leading to my fiancé.

  Everybody in attendance was standing up, all clad in expensive suits and dresses. Jewels shone under the light of the room rented at the palace. With my head held high, my back straight and a small smile I hoped seemed genuine for the unsuspecting souls here, I took my first step.

  I couldn’t see Mr. Grimes from here with all the people standing, but I didn’t mind. Actually, I was rather thankful. It gave me a few more seconds to get ready to launch myself into this new life I didn’t want.

  The death grip on my bouquet made my fingers ache, but I couldn’t help it at this point.

  With my feet clad in expensive shoes with heels so high I thanked all the hours spent at the Manor walking in high heels, I took measured steps. I only focused on walking straight and keeping my good posture. I didn’t see the people who were looking at me, whispering and probably gossiping. I didn’t worry if I’d fall on my face and make a spectacle of myself. I went through the motions as it had been drilled into me.

  And then, I finally saw Mr. Grimes.

  His dark eyes were the first thing that registered in my mind. They seemed so alive, so intense as he stared at me walking toward him. I didn’t know the man so I couldn’t read what was in his eyes, but at that precise moment, I wasn’t as worried. The intensity I caught didn’t feel as worrisome as when we had dinner at the Manor.

  After another two steps, my eyes finally left his to take him in as a whole. His suit, a three piece, was perfectly tailored and accentuated his stature wonderfully, so much so that he seemed even bigger than the last time I had seen him. Or maybe the importance of that day only put things out of proportion in my head.

  The fact remained; Mr. Grimes looked dashing in this suit and under any other circumstances I’d gladly call him handsome and incredibly sexy.

  There were three steps to climb to get to the hotel where Mr. Grimes, his best man, a tall and leanly muscled fair-haired man, and Megan waited. I went to grab a hold of my dress so as to not stumble on it and saw Mr. Grimes’ hand extended toward me. His frown was deeply etched on his face and his mouth was a straight line as if this process was as painful for him as it was for me. Slowly, with a reluctance I hoped nobody caught, I brought my hand to his and let him help me climb the short stairs to reach the hotel and the priest waiting to start the ceremony.

  Mr. Grimes’ hand in mine was foreign and hot, grounding me here when all I wanted was to drift away. As soon as I righted myself I pulled away and faced the priest as my fiancé’s eyes burned me to my core.

  MATHIS

  “You may kiss the bride,’’ the priest said with an indulging smile, officially ending the wedding ceremony.

  I turned to face Lila and once again her beauty was like a sucker punch. I knew she’d make a gorgeous bride, but I hadn’t expected feeling quite so possessive upon seeing her walking down the aisle toward me. And when we said our ‘I do’s’, I was rock hard in front of the priest. I didn’t care as images of my wife under me, writhing while I fucked her was all that was on my mind.

  Her eyes, big and unblinking, locked with mine. I was well aware that kissing me was the last thing she wanted and a part of me hated that. Not so much that she didn’t want to kiss me because it showed her character, her spirit and that’s exactly what attracted her to me in the first place. What bothered me was doing something such as a kiss when she didn’t want it. Not once in my life did I ever have to kiss a woman who didn’t want me to.

  Under the watchful gazes of my family and a few important business partners and clients, I closed the space between Lila and I. I cupped her face in one hand and a damn shiver went down my spine when the warmth and softness of her skin registered on my fingers and palm.

  She stopped breathing when I leaned down to reach her perfect plump lips and I breathed her in right before my mouth met hers. Her perfume, heady, enforced more decadent thoughts to my mind. And then, finally after spending two months fantasizing about touching her, I kissed my wife.

  Everything in me told me to deepen the kiss and taste her, fight for dominance, but instead, I only brushed my lips against hers, once, twice and then a final third time. Right when I pulled back, I nipped at her lower lip discreetly and I smirked down at her when she gasped. My eyes immediately found hers and I didn’t turn around to face the guests now all on their feet, clapping for us in celebration of our wedding.

  She narrowed her eyes and forced a stiff smile that didn’t reach her eyes bright with anger.

  Instead of taunting her, I put her hand through the crook of my arm and we faced everybody with a fake smile from her and a smirk from me as we slowly made our way out of the room to join the party in another room rented at the palace.

  Just as we were followed and approached by my sister and mother while my father was once again trapped with his own parents, I leaned down to whisper in my wife’s ear. “How does it make you feel to be Mrs. Mathis Grimes?’’

  She glared at me and I was like a moth to a flame upon seeing the fire in her eyes, so bright, so irresistible. I couldn’t really explain what it was or why it had such an effect on me, but it never failed to make me want to take her in all the ways humanly possible.

  “Murderous, Mr. Grimes.’’

  I chuckled at her clipped tone and I knew it only enraged her more. The bouquet in her hand that wasn’t in the crook of my arm shook.

  “Now, Lila, I think you should start calling me Mathis. Or husband if you wish.’’

  “You’re despicable.’’ She gritted her teeth and I caught sight of a tiny muscle in her delicate jaw jump. “Why do you find pleasure in tormenting me even more than I already am?’’

  I glanced over my shoulder and saw my mother and sister getting closer and their huge smiles and happiness contrasted furthermore with my wife’s despair and disgust. Today was one strange day because not once had I ever thought thinking of her as my wife, calling her my wife and being a married man would make me this excited. It had been so long since I had last felt quite like this, whatever this was.

  I stared at her without answering her question and drank in the beauty she was. Beyond the fact that the dress she picked was perfect for her and with just enough of sexiness that made me want to fuck her with it still on, she was a stunning woman without showing an air of condescension I was used to seeing on beautiful women.

  “I don’t think I had the opportunity of telling you how beautiful you look today.’’

  “What?’’ Her eyes widened and her hand in the crook of my arm tensed.

  “I’d really love to take your hand and show you the kind of effect you have on me, but my mother and sister are on their way.’’

  She gaped at me right when I looked away from her mystified gaze to greet my mother and sister with more warmth than my usual. It looked like my wedding softened my edges, but it hardened one other thing.

  ***

  LILA

  “Welcome to the family, Lila,’’ Megan said, holding her flut
e full of bubbly French champagne up to cheer me and my husband after her bridesmaid speech. I’d lie if I said that my heart didn’t squeeze in my chest and a warmth hadn’t overcome me.

  For someone like me who had nobody, no family or friends, hearing someone welcoming me in their life as Megan did and her mother too, it’s something I wanted to clutch onto even with the current circumstances and the man beside me who blindsided me with his compliment and his comment regarding the status of the situation in his pants.

  I clapped with everybody else and stood up to hug Megan when she walked toward me. Her thin frame against me and her sweet perfume that invaded my nose were enough to make me all soft momentarily, pushing away the nightmare that awaited me later tonight.

  “Thank you,’’ I whispered against her ear as I pulled back and offered her a real smile, full and completely genuine, the first one in years.

  “Don’t thank me, it’s true. No matter what, you can count on me to help if you need it. I know your life is complicated right now, but remember that you have people now.’’

  I nodded and sat back while I let my husband thank his sister with a quick embrace that seemed to take Megan by surprise, but the brilliant smile and the unshed tears in her eyes as she looked at her brother told me that this family was struggling even if the love between Sylvie, Megan and Mathis was obvious. Oscar Grimes, the patriarch seemed a bit more difficult to place considering how Mathis seemed distant with him and how the older gentleman greeted me exceedingly formally and didn’t ask me to call him by his first name.

  We sat down again and Megan quickly went back to chatting with the person sitting next to her, leaving me alone to people watch while I ignored my plate, unable to eat another bite as the nerves still tied my stomach into knots.

  “My sister is truly a great speaker.’’

  I turned to look at him, my husband, someone I felt more compelled labeling my husband in my head instead of using his first name. Somehow, calling him Mathis seemed intimate in a twisted sort of way and it made me wary. It was due, without the shadow of a doubt, to the impending wedding night that made me shudder whenever I let myself think about it.

  “She certainly is.’’

  We eyed each other and I could almost see the wheels turning in his head as if he was facing a chessboard and planning his next few moves to put me checkmate. I forced the smile on my lips permanently glued there today to stay put even when all I wanted was to scowl at him and probably say something that would play right into his mind game.

  His dark eyes had a light in them I couldn’t place as if he didn’t find today as grueling as he thought he would and greatly enjoyed playing with me. His lips were slightly turned higher up on one side in a smirk that I was starting to get very acquainted with. Once again, it ruffled my feathers and made me want to find a way to make it disappear, stat.

  His strong hands set down the cutlery on his empty plate before they grabbed the napkin on his knees so he could bring it to his mouth. He did all of this without breaking eye contact.

  The way he kept on silently challenging me, egging me without uttering a word had me more mad than I thought possible, pushing away my worries regarding the wedding night to leave only the burning need to snap at him and storm out.

  “What?’’ I asked in a cold voice that was in complete contradiction to the way I kept my smile up for the guests benefit and so I wouldn’t have Mrs. Stein adding more to the fire.

  “Can’t I stare at my wife?’’

  The way he put an emphasis on ‘wife’ had me shuddering visibly and it only made him chuckle as he finally broke eye contact and grabbed his flute of champagne to take a couple of sips. Without my consent, my eyes landed on his throat and his Adam’s apple that moved up and down when he swallowed.

  I cleared my throat and polished off my own champagne. “I’m sure you’ll have plenty of time to watch me during our marriage.’’ I set down my empty glass and stared at the guests about the room. They were all chatting away blissfully unaware and probably uncaring of what this wedding was truly like. “And tonight.’’

  I felt him leaning closer to me and I sat straighter in my chair if that was possible. My shoulders tensed. Right when I almost convinced myself to look at him, I felt his breath brushing along my jaw and down my neck. It sent pinpricks all over my face and my skin and the smell of his aftershave, something spicy and difficult to place just like the man wearing it, invaded my nose and narrowed my world to his presence alone.

  “Tell you what, Lila. In all my life I never had to convince a woman to fuck me and it’s not going to start today.’’ He ran a hand along my arm. Even with the lace in his warmth, the possessiveness implied in that move, had me shivering in a very confusing way. “We have the honeymoon suite for us tonight and I will not fuck you unless you beg me for it and believe me, at one time you will. Maybe not tonight, but soon.’’ The words whispered in my ear dried my mouth as my whole body seemed at war as to how to react. My chest heaved, but my stomach dropped. My nipples tightened, but my blood ran cold. “Actually, Lila, I do hope you resist tonight. It’ll make the moment I get to be inside you all the sweeter.’’

  “Then you better be ready to never have sex with me during our marriage,’’ I bit back as I turned my head to the side when I felt him pulling away slightly. My smile was gone and I was sure my eyes screamed murder as I stared him down. “If you expect me to ask for sex with you, you can wait a long time. I thought I wouldn’t have a choice, but you gave me a fabulous out, Mathis,’’ I said sternly. His name leaving my mouth for the first time outside of the moment I said my vows rolled on my tongue in a decadent way I couldn’t explain.

  His smirked turned more wicked as a glint in his dark eyes made me think that maybe things wouldn’t be as easy. After all, I was still his wife for the foreseeable future, unless he decided to break the marriage before the mandatory five years were up. If he so much decided to change the rules, he could and I would then end up with my legs open for him to take me and I would have to do exactly what I was taught; pleasure my husband.

  “You’ll learn not to underestimate me, Lila.’’ Then his eyes trailed down my face to stop at my breasts. He brought a finger to his lips and traced the lower one slowly. “I look forward to your resistance.’’

  This time, I was the one to lean closer. I risked a glance at Megan, but her attention was solely on an older lady who happened to be the grandmother. “I don’t get you. You get a wife from a place you know makes docile wives and yet you enjoy when I show you my temper. It doesn’t add up.’’

  “And you want to figure me out?’’ he asked with a humorless chuckle as he fixed the guests without truly seeing them as if he was lost in thought. It didn’t soften his face or make him seem more vulnerable, it only enforced the fact that he was unattainable. “Let me give you advice,’’ he continued as he looked back at me. “Don’t waste your energy on figuring me out. This is a business arrangement.’’

  “Do you truly believe I’d forget it?’’ I laughed but it was without humor, but to another person I was sure we looked like newlyweds sharing sweet nothings and laughing at the same time. “I’m not a silly little girl who believes in fairy tales. I can assure you that if by the end of our marriage I find you mildly decent it’s going to be huge progress.’’

  “Oh, Lila, once again you underestimate me.’’ He chuckled and thanked a waiter that replenished his glass.

  “You have such a high opinion of yourself, it’s maddening.’’ I shook my head and made a move to turn to Megan to chat with her, but Mathis’ hand shot to me under the table. The weight of his hand on my thigh covered by my dress had my head snapping back to him.

  “Don’t always trust your first opinion of someone.’’

  ***

  MATHIS

  Lila was standing in the middle of the honeymoon suite behind the lavish light green couch and facing the window. The city’s lights made her glow and if I was the kind of man who would
spout poetry on his wedding night, I’d do it right now.

  She was probably the most gorgeous woman I had ever laid eyes on.

  Briefly, I regretted giving her an out and depriving me of having sex with my wife tonight because I knew she would never let herself be with me so soon. Somehow, the idea of toying with her, of making her mad with desire and lust for me had me hardening. Also, the fact that I hadn’t had sex since I met her at Carter Manor didn’t help either.

  I cleared my throat and watched her shoulders tensing as she remembered that I was there. In the quiet room I heard her sigh and saw her bracing herself to face me. But she didn’t turn around just yet. “I suppose you’ve changed your mind now that we’re alone and in this honeymoon suite.’’

  “I’m not a mercurial man, Lila,’’ I said and walked straight to the wet bar to pour myself a whiskey neat in a tumbler that was probably of the finest crystal.

  As I brought my drink to my lips, she turned around and even a dozen or so feet away I saw the mistrust written all over her face. For a reason I couldn’t yet explain to myself, my blood temperature rose at that lack of trust.

  I might enjoy playing with her temper, I might have purchased her to marry me and I might be a cold man most of the time, the fact remained; I would never force myself on a woman and I would never physically hurt a woman. In a way, I believed she was still fighting against her instincts that told her she was safe in my presence.

  “Everybody is entitled to change their mind.’’

  I put down my drink on top of the wet bar and traced my lower lip with a finger as my eyes trailed over her still in her wedding dress, a beautiful work that only made her beauty all the more striking.